SOME JOKES...whahahaha

* * *

What is the perfect example of both Good & Bad Luck?

The naughty wind blows the girl’s skirt high (Good luck)

but at the same time

Dust falls into the Hooligan’s eyes (Bad Luck)

* * *

Hooligan sent SMS to his Boss

“Me sick, no work”

Boss SMS back

“When I am sick I kiss my wife, try it”

2 hours later Hooligan SMS to Boss

“me ok, your wife very sweet”

* * *

A girl phoned Hooligan the other day and said “Come on over, there is nobody home”

Hooligan went over. Nobody was home.

* * *

Hooligan on phone:

“Doctor my wife is pregnant. She is having pain right now!!!”

Doctor: “Is this her first child?”

Hooligan: NO! This is her husband speaking!

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Most interesting words I will write on the front of T-shirt of a holland girl

“Excuse me! My face is above!”

* * *

CHILDHOOD is like being DRUNK

Everyone remembers what I did

But I don’t

* * *

When Hooligan was a small boy, he took a knife and wrote his girlfriend’s name on his hand. After a minute he started crying LOUDLY….aaaaaaa….

Why?

.

.

Paining?

.

.

No!!

.

.

Then??

.

.

Spelling Mistake !!!

* * *

At the Party, Hooligan asked a girl “Are you going to dance?”

Girl felt so happy and said “Yes”

And Hooligan said “That’s good, so can I have your chair?”

* * *

Wanna make money through Facebook???

Here is Hooligan’s advice for you

Go to:

Account->account settings->

and click on

De-activate your account

then

Start Working!!

* * *

At exam:

Teacher: “tell me the name of this bird by seeing it’s legs only?”

Hooligan: “I don’t know”

Teacher: “You failed, what’s your name?”

Hooligan: “See my legs and tell me my name!”

* * *

On Date:

Girl: What is 10 years with me?

Hooligan: A second

Girl: What is $10000 for me?

Hooligan: A coin

Girl: Ok give me a coin

Hooligan: wait a second

* * *

Do you know what is A B C D E F G

A Boy Can Do Everything For Girl

Now reverse the order, what is G F E D C B A

Girl Forgets Everything Done & Cathes Boy Again

* * *

Positive-thinking poem:

Little bird in the sky

Dropped shit into your eye

You don’t worry, don’t cry

You just thank God that,

Cows can’t fly

Always be positive

* * *

Once there was a mirror which used to kill “LIERS”

Hooligan: I think, I don’t like beer (killed)

Agro: I think, I’m fluent in more than 5 languages (killed)

Javka: I think (killed)